Who Are You and What Do You Think?

Are you the kind of person who loves to sit down on January first and set new goals for the year, or are you the kind of person that doesn't set goals because you don't want to be tied down to anything specific?  Maybe you are the kind of person that  doesn't need a specific date.  You set a goal whenever something comes up that you want to accomplish. Or have you decided not to set goals because it's not worth the ding to your ego should you not accomplish them?

Every once in a while I learn something that causes an "aha" moment for me.  It's usually something earth shattering in the way I see the world.  This year I got a book for Christmas that has created a huge "aha" experience for me. 

In my mind I know that not everybody thinks the same way.  Yet in my day-to-day practicum of life, I tend to forget that.  This often leads me to misunderstand or misinterpret the actions and thinking of others.  My new book "The 4 Tendencies" is one of those personality books that help you understand the way people are, like "The Color Code", or "The 5 Love Languages", or the series of books by Carol Tuttle, or the Myers-Briggs personality test.  "The 4 Tendencies" focuses solely on one aspect of people's personalities - why we act or why we don't act.  As it turns out, not everyone loves to sit down on New Year's Day and evaluate the past year and set goals for the new year..........which thing I had never supposed.  Even my own husband pointed out to me that he never sets goals on New Year's Day.  He sets them whenever during the year he pleases, whenever something comes up.  Hmmmmm.  After 30 years of marriage how had I not noticed this?

What I love about personality books is that they seek to help us understand ourselves and understand others.  When we understand things about ourselves it helps us to be happier.  When we understand others it helps us to appreciate who they are and why they do what they do. It helps improve relationships. 

For example, from the Myers-Briggs personality test I learned about myself that while I LOVE people, social situations drain me.  Knowing this about myself helps me to gear up for social situations, and gives me permission to come home and crash afterward. 

From The 5 Love Languages I learned what says "I love you" to my husband, myself, my children and others around me. 

From the Color Code I learned what my strengths and weaknesses are in certain areas, as well as those of my husband and others.  I learned in what ways we are alike, and how we are different. 

From books by Carol Tuttle (Dressing Your Truth) I learned how my energy flows, what energizes me, and what looks good on me to accentuate my personality.  There were things in her personality profiles that shocked me.  I remember thinking, "She couldn't possibly know this about me!" or "Oh, that explains why I do that!"  Several times I called my husband in and said, "Listen to this!"  We were both surprised at the uncanny small things that fit each personality profile. 

I am not very far into this latest personality book, but I am already very intrigued by what I have learned.  I naturally assumed that EVERYONE sets new years resolutions.  Now I am learning that people do goals as well as just about everything else in life for certain reasons, and not necessarily the same reasons I have. 

I realize that some of you hate to be categorized.  You don't want to be stereotyped.  If it helps, I look at it more like learning about yourself, seeing what fits and what doesn't in order to understand yourself and those around you better.  And while not everyone wants to be stereotyped, everyone does want to be understood.

As we head into the new year, I encourage you to spend some time exploring and seeking to understand yourself and those around you better.  Doing so leads to better relationships and happier lives, and we all want that.