Since my carbon monoxide accident in April I have been searching for the answer to the question of "why am I still here?". I wrote in one of my recent blogs that "All the thoughts and emotions inside of me are like a large pile of tangled yarn in front of me that I feel compelled to unravel, as though I can't really do anything else until that is sorted out." In my mind I have been trying to untangle this pile of yarn that is my life for the past nine weeks. I have been trying to figure out how my life is to be different because of this experience, for truly all experiences change us in one way or the other. As I was walking with a friend on Friday we were talking about my experience. She asked me if I had figured out why I am still here and how I am changed. As I began to talk, the answer came to me. So strange! Would you believe that I did not know the answer until I said it? I have been pondering on this for weeks, and suddenly, in the moment, the answer comes. It was as though my brain had the answer all along, but didn't reveal it until I opened my mouth and let it out. In an instant what my subconscious brain knew became public knowledge to my consciousness! I have had this happen before, but not in such a dramatic way.
You have probably heard the idea that all the answers to everything we ever need are within us. This thought is taught by many of the great thinkers of our time, as well as times past. I believe it, and yet I had not experienced it, at least not in such a stark way. Life coaches and therapists are excellent examples of this theory. They listen to their clients, and ask questions, but do not provide solutions or answers. They help their clients coach the answers out from inside themselves. How is this possible? I don't know. I just know that it is. Meditation and pondering, and prayer to a higher power are major ways to coach answers from inside us to become public to our own consciousness. Talking through the dilemmas and questions in our lives is another way.
What questions are you seeking in your life right now? Do you believe the answer lies within you, or that your higher power will lead you to it? There is no need to trust me or anyone else, but simply put it to the test. Try one of the following:
-Pray and ask for direction, then be quiet and listen not with your ears but with your heart and soul. Keep a paper and pen close by to write down any thoughts that come.
-Meditate. This may involve a prayer to start it, then sitting in a relaxed position with eyes closed and mind clear of all but the question. Keep a paper and pen close by to write down any thoughts that come.
-Pondering. Pondering is different than meditating in that instead of clearing your mind except for a single thought you are actively thinking about your question and possible solutions, like trying to solve a puzzle. Keep a paper and pen close by to write down any thought that come.
- Talking it out. This can be with another person, or even just with yourself. I have a friend who literally thinks out loud, often as she is walking around outside her house. This does not look as strange as it used to since blue tooth earpieces have been invented, lol! She is actually able to get a lot of clarity and direction by talking out loud. If you know someone who is a good listener, spending time talking with them can be a great way to find answers. Keep a paper and pen close by to write down any thoughts that come.
Whatever way you choose to search for answers to your question, know that given time and patience, answers will come. They may come by inspiration, pondering, meditating or talking, but they will come. You just have to be willing to hunt for them.
p.s. Stay tuned for my next blog to find out WHY I am still here and HOW my life is to be different.
Brilliant!
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