The Blessing of Thanksgiving

Did you know that Abraham Lincoln instituted Thanksgiving as a national holiday?  Did you know that Thanksgiving was first observed as an official holiday in 1863, right in the middle of the Civil War?  It seems that while the country was in the midst of a horrible dividing conflict, a wise president had the insight to institute a holiday that encouraged people to remember all they had to be thankful for, something that may have been very hard at the time.

President Lincoln couldn't possibly have known what modern studies show, that feeling gratitude actually helps us feel better.  One particular study showed that writing daily gratitude in a journal made a difference in both emotional and physical well being, something that would have made a big difference in the middle of a national crisis.

I have found that while gratitude doesn't change anything, it actually changes everything.  Being grateful doesn't change your circumstances, but it changes how you feel in your circumstances.  It makes you more positive, happy and content.  This ultimately can help you change your circumstances.

At this time we are going through a somewhat different kind of national crisis than in Abraham Lincoln's time, a crisis that hurts my heart from all sides.  In addition, many people in our nation are suffering from personal hardships of their own.  A wise man once said that if you treat those you interact with as if they were in serious trouble, you will be right more than half the time.  Many go through unseen trials, invisible to the public eye.  Abraham Lincoln was onto something valuable when he proclaimed a national day of Thanksgiving.

As with any gift, the amount of benefit you get depends entirely on you.  This Thanksgiving you may choose to enjoy the day off, and eat delicious foods prepared by you or others...... or you may take it a step further and add listing those things you are thankful for......... or you make take the opportunity to start a journal of daily things you are grateful for, considering the ways your life is blessed.  You may even choose to give thanks to your Higher Power for the good things in your life. 

Thanksgiving itself is a gift, an opportunity to think about and contemplate the good things in life.  May each of us use that gift to the extent we choose, and may we each see the many good things our life in this country contains.

Imprints

When you think about someone walking across a sandy beach barefooted, you can almost see the imprints of their feet left in the sand behind them.  You may have a sweet memory of making imprints of snow angels in the fresh snow, or of imprinting your fingers into soft play dough.  These are physical imprints.

There is another kind of imprint, the kind you can't see. These are the prints that are made on one's soul.  These can be positive or negative imprints, but they make a mark on us that stays with us.  If we could visualize our souls, we would see that all of our experiences leave imprints on us that affect us in some way. 

Many years ago when I had a house full of little children our washing machine broke down.  It wasn't fixable, and we had no money to replace it.  My generous neighbor across the street offered to let us use her laundry room one day a week......for as long as we needed.  Her laundry room was right inside her garage door, and she left her garage door up every Monday so that I could walk through her garage to do my laundry.  It was a real life saver.  I did this for months until we could afford a new one.  I have never forgotten that kindness.  It made a permanent imprint on my soul.  That experienced changed me. 

Another neighbor would use a blower every fall to blow all the leaves from our road, gutters and sidewalks onto our lawns.  She didn't just blow the leaves in front of her own house, but all of the houses around her as well.  She made it easy for us just mow up the leaves from our grass, and our street looked well manicured.  She performed this act of kindness for all of us for many years until she moved away.  The imprint this left on me has instilled a desire to be aware of the needs of those around me, and help in ways that I can.

Another imprint came when I came home at dinner-time after a hectic day of taking care of little ones, driving carpool, parent-teacher conferences and transporting children to far away dance classes that ended at dinnertime, then fighting traffic to get home.  I walked in the door exhausted with my hungry children and wondered what I could make for dinner.  There, sitting on my counter, almost to my disbelief, was a beautiful casserole and a basket of rolls.  I literally had to touch it to make sure I was not hallucinating.  Not only was I not hallucinating, but it was still hot!  I later found out it came from a neighbor a few streets over who had made double and thought of me.  Her timing was unbelievable.  That meal, on the busiest of days, left an imprint on my soul that will never be forgotten.

We all have the ability to leave positive as well as negative imprints on each others souls.  I pray that in our efforts to make the world a better place we seek to leave positive imprints on all those around us, and on our own families most of all.

How to Treat a UTI Without Antibiotics

Do you suffer from recurring UTI's, or know someone who does?  UTI (Urinary tract infection)  studies show that around 60% of women suffer from recurring bladder infections.  I have suffered from them practically my whole life.  I have five sisters.  Most of them struggle on a regular basis as well.  For years I have taken antibiotics every time I get an infection.  For me, these infections come on quickly, usually in less than an hour.  When this happens I drop everything and beeline it to the closest Instacare.  It is hugely disrupting, upsetting and painful.  I have even had to have doctors call  in prescriptions for me to take on vacations and camping trips in case an infections should crop up.

Besides the inconvenience of these emergencies, it is also not good for the body to take antibiotics so often.  Many antibiotics have unwanted side-effects, resistance can build up, and the killing of good bacteria or flora of the body as well as the bad, putting the body out of balance for prolonged periods of time.  I recently read an article from the Mayo clinic outlining the risks of taking antibiotics too frequently.

After years of taking antibiotics multiple times per year, one of my sisters told me she had discovered a way to treat UTIs without antibiotics.  I was instantly interested.  She gave me a recipe for an aloe vera drink to be taken for 1-2 days when symptoms start to manifest.  I went out and got a giant aloe vera plant immediately.  The first couple of times I tried this method it totally worked.  Then...... it stopped working.  It would hold the symptoms at bay, but it no longer cured the infections for me.  I still had to get an antibiotic, just not quite as urgently.  Nevertheless, this experience opened my mind to the possibility that a UTI could possibly be cured in ways other than antibiotics, and I spent the next several years searching for any such solutions.  The internet surprisingly was of very little help.

Eventually another of my sisters told me that taking Alka Seltzer cures her UTIs.  Crazy, right? I tried it.  Though it works for her, it only held mine at bay. But it worked well enough for me to put off getting an antibiotic until it was convenient within a short 24 hour period.

Eventually I was led to oils and holistic methods, which, being a nurse, I never thought I would turn to.  Surprisingly, I have actually had success with this method!  Since spring I have successfully cured 3 UTIs without antibiotics. I am so thrilled with this success that I want to share it with you! 

I have no idea why some methods work for some people but not for others, so here is a list of all the possible things that may work for you.  Try different things and find the combination that works for you. (listed from easiest things to try first to more involved methods)

1. Alka Seltzer: Take 1 Alka Seltzer dissolved in water when symptoms occur, and one right before bed so it can sit in your bladder all night.  Take one more as needed.  If this method is going to work, it will by this point.

2. Aloe Vera drink:
Three large aloe vera leaves (YouTube how to cut and gut if needed)
Two Tbsp lemon juice
Three Tbsp honey
Water/ice to make 6 cups total
Blend all in blender and drink this throughout the day.  May need to make a batch/day for 2-3 days.  Again, if this method is going to work, it will by this point.

3.  DoTerra oils: (DoTerra brand specifically because it has no additives/fillers and is more concentrated/pure than other brands)  *Independent studies about this available upon request.
In an empty gel capsule add 3 drops each of oregano, tea tree and lemon oils.  Take these oils 4-5 times per day.  You can put the oils directly on your tongue, but they are very unpleasant to take straight.  Gel capsules are very inexpensive and much more pleasant to use.  Do this method for 10-16 days or until you feel the infection is gone.

4.  Goldenseal/Silver spray combination.
Again, you will need gel capsules.

Drop 1 dropper-ful of this specific Goldenseal liquid into a gel capsule.  Take this 3-4 times per day. Also spray 10 sprays of this specific silver spray directly into your mouth 3-4 times per day.  (do not eat or drink for 5 minutes after spray) Use this combination for up to 6 weeks, or until you feel you no longer need them.  The amount of times per day can be decreased as time progresses.  If you are not sure, just do 6 weeks.

5.  Here is the most complicated method.  I have had to do this extreme combination only once, and I'm going to warn you now, it is pretty involved, and feels somewhat overwhelming and consuming at first until you adjust to the routine for the duration. 

*First, take 2 dissolved alka seltzer tablets.  May take AZO (pyridium over-the-counter for bladder pain.  Do not take pyridium on an empty stomach.  Believe me, I have done this and throwing up this bitter pill is one of the worst things I have ever done.  Also, it turns your urine bright orange.)

*Rub on your lower abdomen moring and night: a combination of DoTerra oregano, tea tree oil, lemon, lemongrass, onguard and thyme.  This is easiest if you combine them in a roller bottle.  You can add equal amounts of about 30 drops of each to the roller bottle for ongoing use.

*Apply to bottoms of feet morning and night:  1 drop of oregano oil to 10 drops of coconut oil or fractionated coconut oil and   (Oregano is a natural bacteriocide)

*Take a gel cap of 3 drops each of oregano, tea tree and lemon oils 3-5 times per day.

*Take the ACS 200 Extra Strength Colloidal silver spray (pictured above) 10 sprays in the mouth 4 times per day, not eating or drinking for 5 minutes after application. (easiest if you do it the same number of times as the last step, and at the same time)

*Take Natures Answer Goldenseal Extract drops (pictured above) 1 dropperful in capsule 3-4 times per day. (easiest if you do it the same number of times as the last step, and at the same time)

*Alter your diet to sugar free and dairy free for the duration of the infection.

*Drink half your body weight in ounces every day. 

*During bathing, wash peri-area with combination of liquid soap, 10 drops coconut oil, 2 drops oregano, 2 drops tea tree, 2 drops lemon, mixed in hand until lathers, then lathered in peri-area.

*You may also want to consider taking Prescript Assist specifically, a pro-biotic daily.

All of the products mentioned are available on Amazon.  DoTerra oils are cheaper directly on their website, DoTerra.com, especially if you pay the $35 membership fee  per year, or even better,  join a team to get even more perks from joining.  (I can give you more info on how to get the most out of your membership should you choose this route)

If all of these methods fail, you may have to break down and get an antibiotic.  I did have to do this once since I started using natural methods.  Some bacteria are nastier and harder to get rid of than others.

If you are someone who struggles with these unpleasant infections, may I suggest that you be proactive and procure the needed supplies ahead of time, so that when the crisis hits, you are prepared and ready for action!  Yes!

The Last Peach

Isn't it beautiful?  This is the last peach of the season from our peach tree.  I am always a little sad when I pick the last peach.  As I reach up into the branches and slowly pull down on the reddish pink fruit and feel that final "pop" as the tree lets go of the very last one, I always feel a little sad.  It signals that peach season is officially closing.  Of course, what follows at our house is the making of the last peach pie of the season, and then the time when I take the very last peach out of the fridge, peel it and eat it while letting the juices drip right into the sink.  Then that's it until the next year.  No more.  The end.  Sure, you can still get peaches at the store throughout the year.  But they taste NOTHING like a fresh peach from the tree.  NOTHING.  I've heard the same thing about bananas and mangoes, though I have never lived where those are locally grown fruits.

I think back to when I picked the first peach of the season, such an exciting time!  We LOVE peaches at our house.  It is our favorite fruit.  Every year we wait and wait and watch the peaches grow.  It seems like they will never get big enough or start to turn pink, but eventually they always do.  I usually go out and look at the peaches every day when school is about to start.  Finally one day toward the end of August I will go out and there they will be, a few peaches that finally look ripe!  The first peaches of the season.  There will only be a few at first.  I pick them when they look ripe but still feel hard.  Then we bring them in the house where I gently feel them each day until I know they are ripe.  Then I take that first peach, peel it and eat it while letting the juices drip right into the sink. There is nothing sweeter than eating that first peach of the season.  It's indescribably wonderful.  Invariably, within four to five weeks, the magic peach season ends, and I find myself standing at the sink eating the very last peach.  (Mom's rights.  I get the first and the last peach.)

I take comfort in the knowledge that peach season will come again.  I never eat that last peach thinking that I will never get to eat another peach from my tree, though that could happen if either the tree or I croaked.  I always look forward with hope to the next season.

Sometimes wonderful seasons of life end too.  Babies grow up, special vacations or family moments come and go, jobs come and go, friends move away.  Sad? yes.  Is it the end of the world?  No.  (But sometimes it feels like it.)  Just like with peach season, you have to have hope that another wonderful season will come.  In the meantime, enjoy and savor those special moments and people you do have.  Enjoy them to the very last drop.

Missed Opportunities

This year, for the first year since we planted our peach trees, I am working full-time.  This means less time at home to do things.  This year, for the first time  I could not get all the peaches picked from the tree when they needed it, and, combined with a couple of wind storms, I ended up with a LOT of peaches on the ground.  This happened twice!  The first time it happened I felt sick.  I counted 75 fallen peaches.  Then it happened again about a week and a half later.  All in all, I counted about 150 wasted peaches that hit the ground, bruising them instantly beyond use, or at least beyond what I was willing to use them for.  A hundred and fifty wasted peaches.  That is at least a full bushel.  So sad.  When I took this picture I photographed the side that had less peaches against the trunk.  The other side of the tree was even worse, but I felt so sick about it I couldn't even take a picture of how bad it was.  I was pretty devastated at having wasted so much fruit.  I didn't mean to, it just happened.  But the end result was the same.  Missed opportunity and regret.  I hate regret.  It felt like such a waste of food.  Yummy, delicious food that only comes once a year.  Food that I would like to have eaten and shared.

As I picked up the squishy wasted fruit from off the ground and threw it into our large garbage can I thought about how sometimes I experience other kinds of wasted opportunities as well.  Perfect moments when I didn't say what I wanted to, and didn't get a second chance.  Opportunities to do something for someone else that I didn't take and later regretted.  Times when I hesitated or waited to long and someone else jumped in and got the thing I was waiting for.  Do you know where I'm coming from?

Often I was just not paying attention, or I was nervous and hesitant instead of brave and assertive, but the end result was the same - regret.  I hate regret. 

I have regrets about not keeping up on my blog this year.  The other day a dear friend said she hadn't heard from me in a while, and missed reading my blog.  She reminded me that while I may not get a lot of comments, what I write means something.

The good thing about missed opportunities is the chance to LEARN SOMETHING, painful though it may be.  Next year when peach season rolls around you can better believe I will manage my time better, or delegate, or both.  I have learned something valuable this year.

The same is true in writing blogs, missed perfect moments, and all the other missed opportunities.  We ALL have missed opportunities that we regret.  We are all human.  It's unavoidable, and it's how we learn.  We make mistakes.  That's just how life is.  It's what you do with those mistakes that matters.

This is silly, but after I picked up all the fallen peaches and put them in the garbage can, I covered them over with grass clippings so I wouldn't see them and think about them any more.  It was time to put my mistakes behind me and move on.

Just like with my fallen peaches, when we have missed opportunities in life,it's wise to take the time to figure out what should have been done differently, and what to do differently the next time.  Leaving the garbage can lid open, so to speak, so you can constantly revisit what you missed may not be the best option to help you move forward.

Instead, considering going through the regret, figuring it out for the future, then covering your missed opportunity with figurative grass clippings, closing the lid and moving forward.  There will still be more peach seasons and life opportunities to come. 

Do You Need an Upgrade?

Sometimes in life we put up with things that make an emotional drain on us without realizing it.  These can be big things or little things or both.  It can be anything from putting up with a broken or damaged part of your home until it just feels normal, to driving a car with broken air conditioning and putting up with it, to something as small as keeping old and ugly things that need to be replaced. 

Recently I received a beautiful candle for my birthday.  I decided it would be fun to put it with the other candles around my bathtub.  (If you've never taken a bath by candlelight you are missing a peaceful and relaxing experience)  When I carried the candle up to my bathroom I was shocked at the contrast of my old candles against my new one.  I hadn't realized my old candles looked so shabby!  Yes, I had had them for about 100 years (okay, well at least 20 years), and I hadn't wanted to waste them.  I wanted to use them up all the way.  Besides, who knows when the electricity might go out?  So I have had them by my tub to give me occasional enjoyment thinking they were wonderful and not noticing how yucky-looking they had become.

Until my new candle entered the scene. 

When I set the new candle next to the old ones I was shocked at how shabby they had become.  I decided to set the new one apart from the old ones, which lasted for a few weeks.  But my eyes had been opened to the difference, and I wanted to throw them away and just keep the new candle.  I am embarrassed to admit that this actually caused me some internal struggle.  I wrestled with the idea of throwing something away that was still usable.  Then I remembered what I had learned at a class a couple of months ago about upgrades.  When you upgrade anything in your life, it has an emotional component that is also upgraded.  I realized that these old, ugly and mostly used candles were an emotional drain and an eyesore.  So I took them out to the garbage and threw them away.  An upgrade to a new candle felt light and happy, a physical and emotional upgrade.

This is a small example but a valuable one.  If just a candle can feel light and happy, what would a larger upgrade do?  If you are able to upgrade something in your life, why not do it?

When we allow ourselves to keep around things we don't need, or that don't benefit us, or that are are physical and emotionally draining without realizing it, when we get so used to seeing things that we don't see them for what they are anymore, we give ourselves a downgrade.  This affects us physically and emotionally in small ways, or in big ways, depending on what it is.  My candles were a very small downgrade, but a downgrade none-the-less. 

Any upgrade in life is a positive thing.  Think about this.  Walk around your house with new eyes.  Think about your life with this in mind.  What is in your power to upgrade?  And what are you waiting for?  Make one move.  Then make another.  Even small differences will lighten you emotionally and bring a spark of happiness, something that we all need. ♥

A Crazy Dream

Have you ever had one of those dreams that wasn't just a dream?  A few weeks ago I dreamed I was standing across the street from Macey's store with my husband and others.  We were waiting for the light to change so we could cross the very busy six-lane road to the store.   I saw the light change and the walk sign turn on.  I started across but soon realized that I was quickly losing momentum and energy.  By the time I got halfway across I could no longer put one foot in front of the other. My husband had not followed.  I knew the light would change soon and I would be in the way of traffic.  I dropped to my hands and knees to continue making progress, but the more effort I exerted, the slower and weaker I got.  The "no walking" sign flashed up and the other light turned green.  I was right in the way in the cross walk.  I wondered if the cars would run over me, but they stayed at a stop while I desperately continued to try to crawl, moving slower and slower all the time.  Finally, finally, I reached the curb, then the sidewalk, the finally the small section of grass between the sidewalk and the parking lot.  I collapsed onto the cool and prickly grass with a deep exhaustion so encompassing that I have only known it while trying to come out of anesthesia or during my carbon monoxide poisoning trying to fight to consciousness.

I laid there unable to move or open my eyes, though I was still conscious.  After a few moments I sensed someone was standing near me.  I didn't think I could open my eyes to see who it was.  Finally I mustered enough energy to open my eyes and tilt my head just a little to see who was there.  It was Jesus.  He smiled and extended his hand out to me to help me up.  I didn't think I could lift my arm, but somehow I did, and as soon as his hand touched mine I received enough energy to stand up.  We began to walk across the parking lot together towards Macey's.  I was extremely surprised how quickly my normal amount of energy returned, allowing me to walk as though nothing at all had happened.  End of dream.

This dream was so real that when I drove past that very spot the next day, I swear if I could have done DNA testing, I would have found evidence that I had actually been in that spot on the grass.

As I pondered this very realistic dream I felt it was a representation of my life right then, and a hope of what was to come.  I had been working an extremely difficult job that was draining the life out of me emotionally and physically.  I often felt that I didn't know if I could keep going.  I was waiting for a very good job to open up when I had this dream, and it had not yet opened.  I felt that emotionally I was "face down" in the grass.  I stayed in that emotional place for weeks.  Finally I was given the opportunity to change to a wonderful new job.  Over the past weeks I have felt myself muster enough energy to open my eyes, and start to rise from the grass.  I don't know if I am walking yet, but I can feel that I am no longer "face down".

I share this dream in hopes that when you have hard times and feel that you are barely hanging on, or are emotionally crawling on your hands and knees across traffic, not knowing if you are going to get run over at any minute, or when you are face down in the grass and are too exhausted to open your eyes and go on, that you will know there is hope.  This is not the end.  Keep alive the hope that someone will come and extend a hand to you to lift you up so you can keep going.  Believe that you can be given new energy, and can receive strength to walk across the figurative parking lot and into the grocery store to be replenished.

Rubbing Shoulders With Royalty

A few weeks ago my husband and I went to a 3-day conference.  As we waited for the doors to open on the first day I noticed a beautiful lady at the front of the line who was wearing a crown.  I assumed that she was there to help present, and was probably local royalty from one of the pageants.  I noticed that she was very friendly with all those around her.  I waited through the conference for her to come to the stage to speak, but she never did.

The second day I again saw her wearing her crown and sitting near the front in the audience.  By now I assumed she was local royalty and had been instructed to wear her crown to all public events.  We happened to end up in the seats right behind her.  Eventually we struck up a conversation with this woman and her husband.  As it turned out, she had not won a local pageant recently, but wore the crown because she had one, and felt prompted to.  I thought that was brave of her. 

As my husband and I got to know this couple over the next two days, I began to notice that she carried herself and acted exactly as you might expect a loving queen to act.  She seemed to want to get to know and love everyone she crossed paths with, just as a good queen would.  She was confident yet humble, interested and invested in all she talked to.  You could actually feel the love she had for you as you talked to her, even though she had never met you before.  I noticed also that people who met her also treated her with great respect and kindness, as though she was truly someone royal.  It was quite the experience.

It struck me that EACH of us really is royal.  Is God not our father and king?  Does this not make us royal as well?  As we sat in the conference room on the last afternoon I imagined that every woman wore a crown, and that we were a room full of royalty.  It took my breath away to imagine this.  It made me feel part of something majestic and important.  It made me feel lucky to associate with those people.

Since then I have tried to imagine a crown on the head of every woman I meet.  (I realize that the men are as entitled to crowns as the women, and I am working up to imagining that as well.)  It is amazing the way you look at someone differently as you imagine them as royalty.  It has changed the way I see and treat people.  It is truly an honor to meet and serve them.  It feels like a privilege.

I realize also that I am better at imagining others as royalty than imagining myself as royal.  This is not unusual for women.  We tend to see our own value last.  This shift is a work in progress.  I have to do it in stages.

I invite you to give this visualization a try.  You may have some amazing realizations.  Try it on the checker at the grocery store, the people you see and associate with every day, and your server at the restaurant, or whomever you come in contact with.  It truly will shift the way you see the world.  Then try imagining it on yourself.

Abundant Thinking

In the past, whenever I would drive anywhere I would park in the more out-lying rows from the entrance of the building, thinking that the closest rows were always full.  I told myself that there were never any spots available close by, so why waste my time driving up and down them and then end up on the more out-lying rows anyway?  So I skipped the driving up and down step and just parked farther away to begin with.  Then I got my current job (described in my last blog post) and now I spend tons of time driving in and out of parking lots and parking my car.  Because I currently get paid according to how fast I get in and out of stores, I am more motivated to park as close as possible.  One day I had a new thought: "Someone has to get those close-by parking spots.  Why not me?"  I decided to take a chance and drive down the row closest to the entrance.  To my surprise and delight I found a completely empty parking spot very close to the entrance.  This tiny success motivated me to try for the good parking spots again....and again.... and again.  As I drive in and out of parking lots all day long, I have discovered that more often than not I can find a close-by empty parking spot, or someone just pulling out of a prime spot at the very time I am driving toward them.  On rare wonderful occasions I have even gotten lucky enough to park right next to the handicapped stalls, closest to the door, something I formerly though completely impossible at all times.

The other day I realized that my thinking about parking spots has changed.  Someone has to get the close spots.  I have come to expect it to be me a great deal of the time.  Why not me?  It is abundance thinking.

I wondered what other areas of my life I need to upgrade my thinking in.

I am trying to get a specific nursing job right now.  There are no openings at the moment, but when one does come open, somebody has to get that spot.  Why not me?

What about this one--somebody has to win those drawings you frequently see people entering.  Why not me?

There are plenty of people who make good money, who are successful in their business ventures.  Why not me?

There are plenty of people whose efforts make the world a better place.  Why not me?  And why not you?

If I think I can never have a good parking spot and I don't even look, I for sure won't get one.
If I think I can never get the prime work position and I don't shoot for it, I for sure won't get it.
If I think I will never win a drawing so I don't enter, I for sure won't win.
If I think I will never have an abundance of money, I won't.
If I think I'm too little of a fish in the sea to make any difference at all, I for sure won't.

I have a young friend who swims competitively.  In a conversation recently she was talking about her regional swim meet, and how the top swimmers would get to go on to the state competition.  She told me she probably wouldn't make it to state.  (What?!)  I enthusiastically told her that if she didn't think she could make it to state, she for sure wouldn't!  I assured her that she needed to be able to see it and believe it in order to achieve it. Abundance thinking.

I have heard many successful people describe how they believed they could achieve what they wanted, how they imagined it over and over again and how it felt, before actually having the abundant success they were now enjoying.

I think there is a lesson for me and you here.  Abundant thinking seems to lead to abundance.  Who would have thought, lol!  I, for one, and ready to put this theory to the test.  Are you?

Sometimes The Work Isn’t Fun

A month ago I started a temporary job while I am waiting for the Nursing job I really want to come open.  The Nursing job is worth waiting for.  Because this temporary job (not in the medical field) does not pay enough, I am working a lot of hours to bring in the income needed.  I have had to give up a lot of things that brought me great joy, and I feel like I basically do nothing but work, eat and sleep.  This new job is not fun.  It is not in my field of expertise.  It is not something I like or am good at.  In fact, I am not using my talents at all to do this job.  It involves a lot of driving (not my favorite) and hunting for items in unknown locations (definitely not my forte).

The other day as I was doing this unappetizing work I had the thought that my days were just being wasted doing nothing valuable.  As this idea began to grow in my mind I had to question if that was really true.

What is true that the things that felt like they gave my life meaning, and which I have been accustomed to having in my life are not there at the moment.  Does that mean that my days have no meaning, no benefit right now?  Are they truly "wasted days" except for the money they provide?  As I pondered this thought further I realized that even these hard, seemingly wasted days are of benefit.

What I am going through is HARD.  Even so, I realize that when open, I always learn from hard, and any time I’m learning the experience is not a waste. "Okay", I thought, "what am I learning from this hard experience?"  As I racked my brain I realized that I am being forced to make a choice to practice what I preach.....or not; to find good no matter my circumstance.....or not.  Do I really believe what I teach?  When things are tough and don't go as expected, what can I find that is good?

I realized that I am being humbled.  I realized that I am being refined.  It has taken me over a month, but I am starting to learn to find joy in this difficult and unpleasant job.

Are there good things about this job?  Yes, but I have had to look farther than usual to find them.

Will this experience change me in positive ways?  Yes, if I let it.

I know that I can come out of this experience more grateful, more appreciative when my "real" job comes open.  I will have more empathy for people who do this type of work.  I am learning to see the good that I am providing, a service that others need.

I am learning that while I am in a sea of strangers all day every day I can share a smile, be friendly, be a light to those around me in many tiny ways.  I can look for positive around me.  I can enjoy the scenery God has provided while I am driving.  I can appreciate a car that is warm and runs.  I can appreciate having a way to meet our financial needs.  I can feel thankful for a job that lets me work as many hours as I want.

I do not know if I will be doing this job for a week or a year.  I must gear up to find a way to be happy now, because the alternative of trudging through each dreary day unhappily is just one I don't want to live with.  And I don't have to.

Learning to Love Winter

I am one of those people who is always cold.  I LOVE summer because it is when I am the most warm.  Spring and autumn are not too bad, but every fall I absolutely dread winter coming.  I live in Utah where it is winter/cold roughly five months of the year.....that's almost half.  "Why not move somewhere warmer?" you may ask.  Almost all of my family lives here--my parents, sisters, children, grandchildren and friends.  I love our home, our neighborhood and our location, so does my husband.  So this is where we live......but I still always dread winter.  "Dress warmer", you may suggest.  I DO dress warmer.  I wear long underwear in the winter, long sleeves, thick socks, scarves, sweaters and boots.  I still feel cold because the air is cold. 

This fall I got tired of being miserable.  I decided I was going to stop dreading winter.  I was going to find a way to love winter.  There had to be a way.  As the first cold blasts of air started rolling in around the end of October I started looking for what was good about it.  The first thing I noticed was that I was looking forward to drinking hot chocolate.  I love hot chocolate!  Later as I drank my first steaming cup of the season I realized that if it was warm all the time I would never drink hot chocolate.  It's definitely a winter drink. 

As the weather turned colder I got out my heated blanket, my pink fuzzy robe and my thick fuzzy socks.  Then I realized that if I lived where it is hot all the time I would never get the satisfaction of snuggling under a heated blanket and feeling my cold toes warm up.  I would never get to wear my soft fuzzy robe or my thick, soft fuzzy socks.  They definitely feel luxurious and warm.

As November, December and January passed I began to notice other things: the way hot soup tastes going down my throat and warming me from the inside out, the comfort of snuggling under heavy warm blankets, the way a hot bath feels when you soak in the tub (especially with the lights off and a few candles lit), how calming it is to stare into the flames of a fireplace, how beautiful the snow looks.  (Christmas just wouldn't be the same without snow.....and being cold).  I love the way fresh snow glistens in the sun, and the way snow can transform the landscape into a breathtaking winter wonderland.  I realized that I even like the exercise of shoveling snow, and especially how rewarding it looks once it is all piled up around the cleaned off driveway and sidewalks.  I like the way the house feels all warm inside, a fragrant winter candle burning while watching the birds pecking around outside the window.  It feels cozy and safe.  It's a winter feeling.

In the end (to my amusement) what I realized is that what has really been happening all these years is that I have focused on what I do not like, and noticed it, instead of focusing on what I do like, and appreciating it.  Since I have started appreciating winter this year, it has been much more enjoyable! 

Then it hit me: This wonderfully simple idea can be applied to anything unpleasant - a job you don't like, a commute that is difficult, a chaotic household or a too-quiet household, being married, being single, having kids, not having kids....whatever your circumstance.  Look for what you like about your situation. Then keep looking.  You might be amazed by what you find.

Sometime I Block the Sun

It is a fact that the sun greatly benefits us.    The sun helps our bodies produce vitamin D, which is important to strong bone growth.  It prompts our brains to promote higher levels of serotonin, which helps prevent depression (among other things).  According to online research  "Without the Sun's heat and light, the Earth would be a lifeless ball of ice-coated rock. The Sun warms our seas, stirs our atmosphere, generates our weather patterns, and gives energy to the growing green plants that provide the food and oxygen for life on Earth." 

The sun is vital to our existence. 

Lately I have noticed that sometimes I block the sun.  I find myself driving with my sunglasses on when the sun is not even out!  Sometimes I put my car visor down when the sun is not even shining in my eyes.  I tend to forget to open the sun roof and let the sunshine in.  I know some people who keep the blinds in their homes closed all the time instead of letting the sunlight in.  Last week I saw a woman at a department store with her sunglasses on inside the store, and it was dark outside.  Of course, she may have had a good reason, like she had been to the eye doctor that day, or she was hiding a black eye or something, but it still looked funny, and reminded me of blocking the sun. 

As I was thinking about this I realized that sometimes I not only block the sun, but the SON, our eternal light.  There are times when I unintentionally block the Son of God, our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ from my life. His light helps our spiritual side grow and become strong.  His light helps us fight through many difficult situations.  His light is vital to our spiritual existence in ways too numerous to number here.  When I keep my spiritual blinds closed, or close my spiritual sun roof so the Son doesn't shine on me, or put my visor down, or keep my spiritual sunglasses on when they are not needed, I spiritually block the Son. 

As I pondered about what specific things I do to shut the Savior out of my life, I realized that when I forget to pray.....or I pray but forget to be present and forget to listen, or when I fail to follow promptings, or when I decide I can do something on my own not realizing I need his amazing light to show me the way, these are ways I block the Son. 
                                                               Why would I do that? 
Why would I block something that does good in my life, a source of inspiration and light and                                                                                   strength? 

I think I tend to unintentionally take the Son for granted.  I forget to pay close attention and I forget to appreciate, just like when I am wearing my sunglasses after the sun has disappeared behind the clouds.

I don't want to take the wonderful sun for granted, but even more I don't want to take for granted the beautiful light that the Son offers me.